Why Am I Nervous???

• written on 06-26-2007 from my previous blog.
  

I'm honestly unsure as to why I'm nervous about my upcoming cesarean this Thursday. I've literally been there, done it, and doing it again this Thursday, so why the goosebumps?

I remember when I gave birth to Keisha. It was the afternoon of October 28, 2003 and I had induced labor until the wee hours of the morning, and finally had my cesarean section noon of the following day. I was honestly relieved when they announced that I'll have a cs instead, since I was already beyond pissed off at the interns who kept screwing my dextrose, taking my blood pressure on the same sore arm with the screwed up dextrose, and those damn IE's. I was also too tired from pushing and pushing, and those induced contractions also didn't help at all to change my temper.

So now, when we had our second child, I expected that I'll have another cs, which I was quite right on. But what bothers me is the fact that I'm actually "bothered." I'm not bothered in a bad way, since I completely trust my doctor (who happens to be a family friend, aside from being the head of the ob-gyn department, and is the same doctor who did my first cs) but I feel excited/nervous/tense. Like the first day of school, just that it's a new school, not the one you used to go to.

*sigh* I'm sure these jitters will go away soon, and I hope I calm down soon enough. I wouldn't want a high blood pressure before the operation.